She Came to Give It to You.

Usher AND Nicki Minaj. Bam.

Inhabiting the same place for awhile, one tends to become complacent and when it comes to meeting new people.

Look. The scenario is often the exact same. “What’s your name?” “Where are you from?” “What are you drinking?” Blah blah blah. It’s like someone created a cheat sheet on how to approach new people. Yeah, not okay. I remember back to when I first came to Korea – bright eyed, naive, and always eager to meet new companions. I would pour energy into conversations, making sure I smiled and laughed appropriately. I used to be, you know, nice. Over the past year, I’ve just met enough people to know better – you can usually weed out the genuine over the well, not. Especially when it comes to men. So why be friendly if the person sucks.

Lately, all of my girlfriends have been raving about an app called Tinder. Apparently, it’s meant for dating (or hook ups?) and it’s solely based on a few Facebook pictures that you can like or not like. If you and the other person both “like” each other, then you can start messaging and maybe schedule a meet up. At first, I was horrified. I have never supported online dating. Ever. It’s like a trap for whatever lonely people were searching for, ranging from marriage to getting some booty. And who is ever honest on their profile, really – you often play yourself up. “Yes, I’m 6’4 and can wear a suit better than David Gandy.” But, after hearing them go on and on about it, I was unfortunately curious. So one evening after work, I looked up the app in the App Store and clicked download. It seemed harmless enough. I arranged maybe 5 photos to be seen and said a few words about myself, thus began the Tinder journey. The app gives you a stack of people that live in the vicinity, and you either swipe left for “nope” or swipe right for “like.” For the first 100 (maybe not that many, but it was a lot) I swiped left. Some of these men were unreal. “Don’t bother me if you aren’t a bit nerdy.” Star Wars fanatic. “I am handsome.” Um. No you’re not. “I don’t know what I’m doing here.” Yeah. No one does. And others were crazy good looking. I’m talking about photoshop models. Homegirl doesn’t need no purrrrrty man. Then I started seeing ones that seemed more normal. So I swiped right a few times. Yesterday I got my first match. No, I haven’t sent a message. It still feels so weird. So he and another guy will just sit in my match folder forever probably. Lucky them.

I can see the appeal of online dating apps for some people. You can just sit and watch a movie, with some wine, and just swipe left or right during the mediocre parts. Super simple. And no strings at all.

So dear Tinder, thanks…? But. no thanks.

Stranger danger


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